Halo
by xamnam
Summary: Humorous events ensue when the world decides to mess with Fugen and his Halo


Disclaimer: Houshi Engi\Soul Hunter is not mine. It belongs to...well, whoever it belongs to.  
  
Also, this is my first try at a fanfic, so I apologize beforehand for all the mistakes I'm sure to make! Any mistakes, please point them out to me and I'll appreciate it. Please review.  
  
I wrote this basically for two reasons. One: Everyone always talks about how Fugen is such a pacifist. I wondered if this was only a mostly outward appearance. Second: I thought that Fugen's halo might also be a paopei. In this, it senses what Fugen really wants to do.  
  
~*~  
  
Taikoubou sat in the brown-dead grass, the wind ruffling his hair. The clouds swirled above him, playing a majestic game of tag while the birds full of song, trilled out beautiful notes in the tress behind him, full of golden and auburn leaves.  
  
All of this was lost on him of course, because he was drunk. Not just "Oh look the room is spinning" drunk, not "How come I'm not wearing any pants?" drunk. He was "Hey look the floating pink and blue polka-dotted elephants are crashing into the sun and turning into fireworks" drunk.  
  
"Hey look the floating pink and blue polka-dotted elephants are crashing into the sun and turning into fireworks," he said to no one in particular.  
  
"Ah, yes, I am sure they are," said Fugen as he walked up beside him. His halo started to fizz as a leaf fell into it, then settled back down. "I have really got to get this thing fixed," he muttered to himself as more leaves fell through and started a chain reaction in the halo. It emitted a small puff of smoke and then all the leaves jetted away, as if propelled by a gust of wind. Meanwhile Taikoubou had fallen over, oblivious of the halo's actions.  
  
"Had one too many peaches today, didn't you Bou?" Fugen ruffled the hair of his unconscious companion. As he leaned over to lie down next to Taikoubou, a bird above him went to the bathroom and the waste went right through his halo, staining part of it a yellowish white, and landed right in the middle of his hair. The halo emitted another puff of smoke and then cleared to a perfect gold again. Behind him birds tried to escape from the trees that had suddenly lit on fire. The gold, red, and yellow leaves went up immediately and the fire raged from tree to tree. All the birds escaped, some missing some feathers, and made a smoky, awkward retreat.  
  
Taikoubou snored gently, having faded into a drunken stupor. Slowly a snail crawled around his face into his mouth. Fugen gently took it and placed it on the ground. It crawled away rather quickly. Fugen sighed.  
  
"At least that's one thing that won't have to suffer his breath right now," Fugen said to himself He looked toward the setting sun. It was every color in the rainbow, setting the sky into regal trim surrounding the sun. As he peered closer, Fugen noticed a wave of grass that was bending down and then straightening, as if something was stepping on it. The wave neared him and Taikoubou. As Fugen looked closer , he saw that the wave was merely slugs. A great many slugs, but just slugs. He let out a breath he didn't know he been holding. He watched the slugs get closer and prepared to let them pass. Instead of passing though, the horde went straight into Taikoubou's mouth!  
  
That finally woke up Taikoubou. He sat up and yawned, unaware of all the slugs inhabiting his mouth. One finally dropped down his throat though and caused to him to notice. He promptly threw up, and spewed slugs everywhere, including Fugen. And as luck would have several passed through his halo, leaving green slime, and fouling his hair.  
  
Fugen tried to pull the slugs off gently, but they stuck in his hair and several dropped down his shirt. The halo emitted the inevitable puff of smoke and suddenly the ground was covered in white crystals. Fugen picked some up and placed it on his tongue.  
  
It was salt. The slugs writhed in pain as the condiment burned their skin. Fugen simply sat there, shaking off the salt that had been in his hair. Meanwhile Taikoubou had picked up one of the slugs and started to stretch it. It shot out of his hands like a slingshot.  
  
"Fugen? Did you do this," Tai asked inquisitively.  
  
"No Bou-chan, I did not do this." He reached down into a small pack he had brought with him. "Here, have a peach." He pulled out a peach and dropped the peach into Taikoubou outstretched hands.  
  
"PEACH!" Taikoubou quickly ate it, careful not to let any salt taint it. Amused, Fugen pulled out another peach and tossed it to Taikoubou. Tai leaped in the air and caught it in his mouth. By the time he had come back down, the peach was gone.  
  
Fugen threw one last peach into the air for Taikoubou. Taikoubou, overexcited, pulled out his Paopei and blasted the peach. He leaped about, trying to catch pieces of the falling fruit. Engrossed in his peach leaping game, he didn't notice Fugen happened to be right in the way of his jumping. He crashed into him. Then the core of the peach hit Fugen squarely in the middle of his head and exploding, causing his hair to become a deep purple.  
  
The halo smoked furiously. All over the grove entire peach groves were disappearing. In local markets, entire crops of peaches suddenly disappeared. Taikoubou's pack deflated , as if it was suddenly emptied. And Taikoubou suddenly found himself thousands of feet in the air above the ocean.  
  
The land around Fugen was clear of everything. No trees remained, the grass looking ever more desolate than before. The birds were gone. No more were songs trilled through the air. And the sky had turned a midnight black.  
  
Fugen got up and brushed everything off of him. His hair had gone back to its normal color. He looked around the empty plains, breathing in the silence. His hair ruffled in an unfelt wind, swirling leaves around his legs.  
  
"Maybe I don't need to get this thing fixed after all." He passed his finger through his halo. His finger had a little residue on it. He tasted it. "Hmm, tastes like peaches." With that he walked off towards the sun, bringing what little warmth that was left with him. 


End file.
